Equipping young women professionals with young families to find fulfillment, contentment and joy as mothers and home makers without losing sight of who they are as women.

Volume 13, Issue 15: Pick One

What's the one thing you can focus your attention on to perfect or to get a better handle of this week that if you did, would give you the most sense of satisfaction?

Sometimes we find that we struggle to perfect a number of things all at once. Weeks come and go and we regret that we have not attained 100% success at any of them. When this happens week after week, it comes a time when we need to decide to go for gold for one pursuit at a time.

This doesn't mean we stop working on the other pursuits. It just means that we prioritize one and give it our all until we master it. Then pick the next one and do the same.

Let's have the mindset that it's all or nothing in the pursuit of our goals. A little bit of success is not success. Getting it right one day and missing the mark the next two days is not success. It is mediocrity. Successful people set achievable goals, they go after them and achieve them. That's who we are, and we are going to do just that.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 13, Issue 14: Pursuing Improvement

One evening last week I wrote, "I thought I had a better handle of today but here I am again settling down at almost 8pm, an hour late. But I am not giving up. I have taken a mental note of the tasks I embarked on after dinner that don't belong in that time slot. I am not giving up. I will get it right".

I certainly had a better week after that recording. But still not where I want to be. Is there something you are trying to perfect but you still don't have a good handle on? A routine maybe, or a new habit? Keep trying. Keep showing up. Take note of the hindrances to your success and work at eliminating them.

Success is not easy. But the interesting thing is that when you attain success at something you have worked hard at, it feels as if you always had it. You will seamlessly ease into the new rhythm. Even so, don't forgot what it took you to get there. Celebrate the achievement and register the milestone somewhere memorable.

Just like each day is an opportunity to do better, each week affords us a new opportunity to pursue improvements in our undertakings. Use the beginning of each week to reflect on the past week and consider ways in which you could do better in the new week. Let's be determined to make improvements each week.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 13, Issue 13: Schedule It

I have found that what gets scheduled and consistently pursued gets done. If there's something you really want to be doing consistently but struggle to actually do, your best bet is scheduling a set time for it when your attention will not be distracted by other things.

For a long while I wanted to read for an hour every day. But each week, I ended up sitting down to read only a few times a week for a few minutes, and sometimes not at all. It was only after I reorganized my daily calendar and activities that reading every day became as regular as having breakfast.

When you try to get a habit down for so long unsuccessfully, it's easy to give up on it and pursue other easy things. The secret is to persist. You may keep falling, but keep getting right back up. Keep trying until you finally get it right. However, it's not enough to persist. You also have to keep your mind open to new ways of trying.

You have a better chance at succeeding if you try methods that work that just trying. They say it's insanity to keep doing the same thing and expect different results. So if the method you have employed hasn't worked, try another method, and another, until you land on the one that works.

What I have found to be work for me is scheduling activities and honoring my calendar. If the calendar says it's time to read, I am not doing anything else. I am reading. It helps to make sure your calendar caters to all your needs so that you don't feel like something else needs your focus and attention when you want to read or to do a workout or to talk to your spouse.

As you gear up, be patient with yourself. It took me a long while before I could honor my calendar. Accept that you are work in progress and celebrate the fact that you are getting better every year. Let this be the year you master scheduling the things you want to do and honouring your calendar.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 13, Issue 12: Crave The Process

It's one thing to say "Enough is enough" and to spell the drastic changes you want to make. It's totally a different thing to actually make the changes. I have realized that we may be passionate about making drastic changes but unless we plan and lay out the modalities for making the changes, no lasting or significant change will materialize.

Last week, I committed to having a hard stop time for work and for other aspects of my evening. As I was reflecting on this new week earlier this morning, it occurred to me that sticking to my calendar today and this week will not materialize unless I plan for it and set parameters that will help me feel good about keeping to my set hard stops.

This quote from James Clear that I saw after I paused writing this article immaculately drives the point home. "It doesn't make sense to continue wanting something if you are not willing to do what it takes to get it. If you don't want to live the lifestyle, then release yourself from the desire. To crave the result but not the process is to guarantee disappointment."

As I was reflecting this morning, I thought through what I need to do from the onset and throughout the course of the day to ensure I live up to my hard stop times today. What have you set your mind on actualizing this season? Are you willing to do what it takes to get it? If you don't want to do what it takes, then you might as well let go of the desire and be happy with your status quo.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 13, Issue 11: Motivation For Drastic Changes

Where does our motivation to make drastic changes come from? How is it that we can be living life one way without giving much thought to some unwholesome habits that we allow to co-exist with us, then one day, all of a sudden, we decide to make a drastic change about it, and actually follow through with it?

Where does that come from? Does that happen to you? It certainly happens to me from time to time. My most recent one happened earlier this week. I take a small handful of home roasted peanuts with my breakfast. I snack on them after I have eaten everything else on my plate. Peanuts are like my after breakfast dessert.

Being cognizant of the high caloric content of peanuts, I prefer to take just one small handful per day. But lately I had been going for second servings of that and even third and fourth servings sometimes. I didn't like that I was doing that, but I hadn't seriously considered stopping it.

Each time I went for a repeat serving, I knew it wasn't right for me to break my commitment to stick to one serving. I knew it wasn't something I wanted to become the norm. But I still did it, amidst the guilt, and sometimes not feeling guilty at all. I wasn't happy with myself about it, but I enjoyed the peanuts.

Then one morning early this week when I wasn't thinking about breakfast or peanuts, it became clear to me that this was something I needed to make a drastic change about right away. And so, I did it. I said to myself that from that point forward, I was going revert back to enjoying only one handful serving of peanuts with my breakfast.

I have so far stayed with the drastic change. I have hardly craved going for a second serving this week, and when I have had the thought, it wasn't hard for me to restrain myself as the commitment I made that morning was strong and is still fresh in my mind.

Looking at this new year alone, I have made a couple of such drastic changes this month and last month. So, going back to my question, how do these things happen? How do we every now and then get to the point where we decide on a drastic change to make and commit to it?

I suppose it could be a couple of things for different people. But for a person of faith like myself, I believe one of it is the Holy Spirit nudging us to live our best lives. As we stay in constant communion with God, His presence is with us ordering our steps, teaching us, rebuking us, helping us and revealing truths to us.

Heed your motivation for making drastic changes for the better and live your best life yet this year.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi