Equipping young women professionals with young families to find fulfillment, contentment and joy as mothers and home makers without losing sight of who they are as women.

Volume 13, Issue 12: Crave The Process

It's one thing to say "Enough is enough" and to spell the drastic changes you want to make. It's totally a different thing to actually make the changes. I have realized that we may be passionate about making drastic changes but unless we plan and lay out the modalities for making the changes, no lasting or significant change will materialize.

Last week, I committed to having a hard stop time for work and for other aspects of my evening. As I was reflecting on this new week earlier this morning, it occurred to me that sticking to my calendar today and this week will not materialize unless I plan for it and set parameters that will help me feel good about keeping to my set hard stops.

This quote from James Clear that I saw after I paused writing this article immaculately drives the point home. "It doesn't make sense to continue wanting something if you are not willing to do what it takes to get it. If you don't want to live the lifestyle, then release yourself from the desire. To crave the result but not the process is to guarantee disappointment."

As I was reflecting this morning, I thought through what I need to do from the onset and throughout the course of the day to ensure I live up to my hard stop times today. What have you set your mind on actualizing this season? Are you willing to do what it takes to get it? If you don't want to do what it takes, then you might as well let go of the desire and be happy with your status quo.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 13, Issue 11: Motivation For Drastic Changes

Where does our motivation to make drastic changes come from? How is it that we can be living life one way without giving much thought to some unwholesome habits that we allow to co-exist with us, then one day, all of a sudden, we decide to make a drastic change about it, and actually follow through with it?

Where does that come from? Does that happen to you? It certainly happens to me from time to time. My most recent one happened earlier this week. I take a small handful of home roasted peanuts with my breakfast. I snack on them after I have eaten everything else on my plate. Peanuts are like my after breakfast dessert.

Being cognizant of the high caloric content of peanuts, I prefer to take just one small handful per day. But lately I had been going for second servings of that and even third and fourth servings sometimes. I didn't like that I was doing that, but I hadn't seriously considered stopping it.

Each time I went for a repeat serving, I knew it wasn't right for me to break my commitment to stick to one serving. I knew it wasn't something I wanted to become the norm. But I still did it, amidst the guilt, and sometimes not feeling guilty at all. I wasn't happy with myself about it, but I enjoyed the peanuts.

Then one morning early this week when I wasn't thinking about breakfast or peanuts, it became clear to me that this was something I needed to make a drastic change about right away. And so, I did it. I said to myself that from that point forward, I was going revert back to enjoying only one handful serving of peanuts with my breakfast.

I have so far stayed with the drastic change. I have hardly craved going for a second serving this week, and when I have had the thought, it wasn't hard for me to restrain myself as the commitment I made that morning was strong and is still fresh in my mind.

Looking at this new year alone, I have made a couple of such drastic changes this month and last month. So, going back to my question, how do these things happen? How do we every now and then get to the point where we decide on a drastic change to make and commit to it?

I suppose it could be a couple of things for different people. But for a person of faith like myself, I believe one of it is the Holy Spirit nudging us to live our best lives. As we stay in constant communion with God, His presence is with us ordering our steps, teaching us, rebuking us, helping us and revealing truths to us.

Heed your motivation for making drastic changes for the better and live your best life yet this year.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 13, Issue 10: Set A Hard Stop

I have noticed that things can spiral out of hand very fast if we are not careful. We can easily plunge back into patterns we want to stay clear off in the new year. It's just been one week of getting back to work and I am already finding myself working through lunch and working late some days. I can't let this be the norm this year. I just can't.

I am living life to the full this year. I refuse to let work overwhelm me. Just because the work is a lot doesn't mean I have to let it get to me. I will tackle it one at at a time in a calm and relaxed way all day, and when 5 o'clock comes along, I will hit pause and proceed to relax and recover. Then pick up where I left the next morning.

I realize that getting overwhelmed is a choice one makes. It is not an automatic response to the magnitude of work on ones plate. I choose the opposite of overwhelm at the start of this year because I know only too well that when I take more than I can handle at work, other aspects of my life suffer.

Overworking is a habit that is easy to slide into. I sometimes find that I want to go on and on working even when I know the time for work is up. By the time I finally pull away from work on such days, I am too drained to do or think much else. I may even want to indulge myself in excessive eating or mindless watching of videos.

I need to make a drastic change on this from the onset. Set a hard stop time for my work days. Such that when the alarm rings, I walk away from my computer irrespective of what is incomplete. What do you need to set a hard stop for in order to steer away from destructive patterns this year?

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 13, Issue 09: Back To Work, Gladly

Return to work thoughts for many people tend to be filled with dread. I admit often feeling that way some years ago. But now, as my return to work day draws near, I don't have that sunk feeling when I think of going back to work. It's okay. And this time around, the long break has afforded me the opportunity to see my days with a different lense. I get to have my special mornings still, then enjoy work after my leisurely breakfast.

To some extent, my days are similar, whether I am working or on vacation. The mornings and evenings are the same. The only difference is the time between breakfast and dinner, I am either working on my computer or doing a myriad of things, or doing nothing mostly around the house. Whichever of the two I am engaged in, my mind and body are in a relaxed state.

I don't find my job a pain. It is hard and demanding, but I am glad to do it. I now look at my days as a loop. I get to do different things with my work day. I get to spend time with God at the crack of dawn, do a workout, go out for a walk, read a book, write, have a leisurely breakfast, work on my computer, and sit down to dinner with my family. What's not to love? I love my work days the same way that I love my off days. They both serve a purpose. I am thankful for both.

I am grateful to have a job to go back to. A job that I love and enjoy doing. If you ever dread going back to work, consider the people who don't have a job to go back to at the start of the year. Think of all the people who are yet to land a job after graduating from college. And all the people whose jobs ended and haven't found other jobs yet. It is a blessing to have a job to go back to after the holidays.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 13, Issue 08: Make The Drastic Change

Just like children, we too can make drastic changes on the spot. While out for my prayer walk this morning, my mind settled on a bad habit I have had for awhile that needed changing. I knew it was a lousy habit and I wanted to drop it, but I had never seriously considered dropping it, until this morning.

In that moment as I prayed, I repented the bad habit, and of course beat myself up for not being smart enough to see it for what it was all this time. But the best part is that I made a concrete decision to replace it with a good habit, which conveniently came to mind right away.

As I write this, now I see what that was all about. It was the Holy Spirit convicting me of a bad habit, and illuminating for me a way out. How wonderful the Lord is to us. He loves us so well, he doesn't want us to miss out on the abundant life he has for us on account of misfits in our makeup. I am so grateful for this today.

I was so delighted when it dawned on me at that moment that I can make a drastic change on the matter. I had lived one way for a time, and now I take a totally different route on the matter. Whenever I come in contact with something for which I used to entertain negative thoughts about the person responsible for the mess, I now make a positive declaration about the person instead.

It's not enough to build good habits. We must endeavor to drop bad ones too, just as urgently. Ask the Lord to illuminate for you a habit that you are entertaining that is not good for you. Then pray for grace to drop it and to immediately replace it with a good habit to avoid a relapse.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi