Equipping young women professionals with young families to find fulfillment, contentment and joy as mothers and home makers without losing sight of who they are as women.

Volume 12, Issue 30: Finish Strong Part I

There's an expression that goes like this. "It's not how you start but how you finish that counts." This is mostly an encouragement in situations where one doesn't start with much stamina or success but is impressed upon to have a great finish. However, sometimes we start well but lose momentum along the way and risk not finishing strong.

My thoughts today are on both scenarios. Starting with the later, high achievers tend to start a seasion or a project on a high note. In some cases, as life happens, they get off track or discouraged when they don't see the results they expect fast enough. Sometimes it comes down to struggling to get back on course after life throws them a curve ball.

But high achievers are resilient. They fight through all sorts of obstacles to finish strong. But this doesn't mean that it is not really hard sometimes to the point of wanting to throw in the towel. And so an encouragement to get back up and keep going can be very valuable and timely.

As the year draws to close, that ball that you dropped along the way when you faced setbacks doesn't have to stay dropped. You can pick it back up and race to the finish line. Which goal have you given up on attaining this year? You tried but things just didn't line up to your advantage. Any chance that you can try again now and see where you get by the time the year comes to an end?

For me it's my writing. I am several articles behind my target of publishing 52 articles in the year, ideally one article per week. But I am not throwing in the towel. I may not make the target this year but I will get close. I am not giving up without a fight. I may have found myself about halfway through my target in the last quarter of the year but I am determined to finish strong on this goal.

What's yours? Is it a health goal, a relational goal, a financial goal, a career goal, a spiritual goal? Which of the goals that you started the year on a high note on is lagging? Do you now realize that it's not too late to finish strong even on that goal? Can you pick it back up and resume the race? You can do it. You can finish strong. It's not too late to get that goal to the finish line and finish 2022 strong. Let's do it.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 12, Issue 29: Don't Beat Yourself Up

As the year draws to a close, many of us have at least one goal that we flopped in. But there are certainly many goals that we aced. I for one didn't write articles as frequently as I intended. And something like this can really put me down if I don't stop to reflect on the grand scheme of things.

Why can't I let this failure determine how I regard my overall performance this year? Because like you, I did many things well, achieved many of my goals. I made progress and improvements in other areas of my life. And in the area of writing, I wrote about 200 words on my journal just about every evening.

So, before you start beating yourself up for not attaining one or a few of your key goals this year, take a moment and list down all the goals that you have attained, and maybe even surpassed the targets you set for yourself this year. You are likely to find that you have many reasons to pat yourself on the back.

The problem with us go-getters is that we forget that we are human, living in a human context where things don't always work in our favour. Sometimes the time we allocate to work on a certain goal gets eaten up by other mandatory activities that overrun their time slots. Life happens, and we need to extend ourselves grace when we find ourselves stretched too thin to do all that we set out to do.

This is not an excuse for mediocrity. We are not those people. We are high achievers and expect a lot from ourselves. And so, even as the year draws to a close, we don't give ourselves a break and relax. We look for opportunities to salvage what we can, and we will continue to do so until the very last minute of 2022.

And when the curtain finally draws to a close on 2022, we will celebrate ourselves for the goals we will have  aced, and for the effort we put in for the goals that we won't have quite driven to the finish line. And then we will strategize for 2023.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 12, Issue 28: Don't Wish Away The Bad

On a taxi ride to the airport yesterday morning I had to encourage myself to shake off the sense of regret and loss I was feeling. That morning I was doing a couple of things in my kitchen before I could leave for my trip. It was important to me that I reset the kitchen for the day and make breakfast for my family before leaving.

The last piece of the hustle was sitting down to eat my breakfast. My taxi was already waiting outside, so I was a bit anxious to wrap things up. Grabbing my lovely glass dish from the oven, my hands followed my multitasking mind, and before I knew it, the dish was on the floor - broken, with my sweet potatoes strewn all over the broken pieces of glass.

I salvaged what I could of the sweet potatoes and had my breakfast in a not-so-pleasant fashion. I knew I had to finish eating then sweep out the glass from the floor and clean up the mess, but at that moment, I just wanted to pretend nothing bad had just happened. But I couldn't shake off the fact that I had broken a glass dish I really liked.

It was when I was well on my way to the airport that I made the shift from feeling bad for breaking my dish. I asked myself and answered these questions: "Did I talk badly to my husband this morning? No." "Did I quarrel my son for something he didn't do right? "No." Did I go out of my way to leave my family well cared for? Yes."

Then I asked myself, "If this is the case, then where does a broken glass dish fit into all these?" And my answer was that in the grand scheme of things for just that morning, a broken glass dish is nothing to feel bad about. In the things that matter most, I had done well by the grace of God. And besides, glass dishes are easy to replace.

Before coming to this conclusion, I did wish that everything had gone smoothly that morning. That the one thing that went wrong didn't go wrong. But now I don't have remorse about it because it made me appreciate all the more the many things that went well that morning.

"The brilliance of the stars would be invisible without the vast darkness of space behind them. Do not wish away the difficult portions of life. They provide the contrast needed to appreciate the joyful moments." James Clear.

Resist the temptation to dwell on and fuss over the one thing that goes awry in your day or week or year. Rather consider it in the backdrop of all that has worked out beautifully, and all the things you have done well. Let the bad apple in your basket cause you to appreciate the many good apples in your basket.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 12, Issue 27: Genuinely Interested

What am I genuinely interested in? Have you ever asked yourself that question? I think most of us have, especially earlier on in our journey. But then life happens and we get busy with what our hands find to do and with the business of life that we forget all about what interests us.

When an opportunity to slow down comes, maybe when we find ourselves in between jobs or when our children grow up and become more independent, it's a good time to find out what we are genuinely interested in.

Before picking up the next thing or occupation that comes along, it's good to pause and find out what you are genuinely interested in. Then align your path in the direction of your passion.

I believe doing what we are genuinely interested in goes a long way in making life effortless. It makes it easier to wake up in the morning because we know we get to embark on things we enjoy doing. You would also find it easier to learn and improve your craft and ultimately become excellent at it.

This quote from James Clear supports this. "If you are genuinely interested, you will find endless opportunities for growth. But if you are disinterested, even obvious improvements will feel like a chore. And, if you can maintain your genuine interest and curiosity as the years accumulate, you will become hard to compete with because you will have skill to go with your passion. If you are interested, you are dangerous."

So, what are you passionate about? What do you most enjoy doing? Take it upon yourself to find out, then take advantage of a pause or change of pace in your career or life to make the shift to do what you are genuinely interested in.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 12, Issue 26: Stewardship of Battles

I was glad to learn this week from Jonathan Evans, the author of Fighting Your Battles book, that battles and struggles are stewardship roles. It is good to know that we don't just steward resources like money and time, we also steward battles.

Are you being a good steward in your struggles or are you stewarding your battles badly? The unfortunate truth is that we are always either in a battle, from a battle or on our way to a battle. It's the nature of life. My achiever orientation wants to make sure that I am doing great no matter the season.

The Word of God directs us on how to carry ourselves in a battle. It says that by prayer and supplication, we make our requests known to God. After that, we choose to receive his peace that surpasses understanding. This means that when we pray, God release his peace to us. But whether or not we take the peace and walk in it is up to us.

Here's what being good stewards of our battles and struggles looks like. We give God the battle by making prayers and supplications. Then we let him take care of the outcome. When we do this, the burden should be easier, the yoke should be lighter. The struggle doesn't go away. It just means that we are different in it. Even if it doesn't change for awhile, or at all, we are changed.

Isn't that just great! As mortals, we have no power to change certain things like God does. What we need to thrive in a battle is to surrender it to the one who has the power to change it, and accept his peace and work in us irrespective of whether he changes the circumstance or not. That's how we steward our battles and struggles well.

For His Glory,

Lillian Chebosi